Your dick, in a nutshell.

The penis is ubiquitous. It’s in your pants, it’s on your mind, it is the subject of just about every email scam, with the exception of that one about the Nigerian prince’s bank account. And yet, despite all of this, the true nature of the penis is still shrouded in mystery. Don’t believe me? Let’s take this short quiz:

1.  What is the name of the upside-down V-shaped area beneath the head of your cock? It is one of the most sensitive parts, so you really should know…
2.  How big is the average erect penis?
3.  Is it possible to make your cock bigger, permanently?
4.  Is there a cream that can make you last longer?
5.  Is there any way to last longer during sex play?

Go ahead and answer. I’ll wait. Don’t cheat and read ahead… you’ll only be cheating yourself.

Okay. Answers are:
1.  Frenulum
2.  About 5.5-6 inches. Give or take. Keep in mind respondents’ tendency to “stretch” the truth, as it were.
3.  Nope.
4.  Nope.
5.  Yes.

How did you score? If you got 100%, good for you. If you didn’t… well don’t worry. That’s why we’re here! Enough delay, let’s get to the meat of the matter, shall we?

Your Penis and You
Let’s begin with a basic anatomy lesson. This is a penis:

The penis is comprised of the shaft and the head. The shaft is the long part, the head, or glans, is the mushroomy cap on top. Basic stuff. The head is chock full of nerve endings, and in most men is the most sensitive part of the penis and the part they focus on during sex play. This has its pros and cons, as we will soon see. The hole in the top of the head is called the urethra, and this is where all of your bodily liquids emerge. The ridge around the head is called the corona, and as discussed above, the upside down V where your foreskin either is or was is called the frenulum.

The shaft is made up of three cylinders of spongy soft tissue that, when aroused, fill with blood and make the penis erect. The main cylinders are called the corpus cavernosa, the smaller cylinder surrounding the urethra is dubbed the corpus spongiosum. Through a complex system of valves (much like the Internet, eh Ted Stevens (R-AK)?), these cylinders allow blood to flow in during arousal, and let it flow back out post-arousal. If you listen closely, you can hear the sound of the ocean.

If you will humor me, I’d like to touch briefly on the balls, the taint, and the ass, even though our focus is on the dick, merely because I want to start to break down that notion that a man’s sexuality begins and ends with his cock. It is not the alpha and the omega, it is merely the penis. So. The balls – two parts – scrotum (sac) and testicles (balls inside sac). Very sensitive, prone to injury, but also can be quite enjoyable if played with correctly. The taint – also called the perineum – the patch of skin between the balls and the anus. The perineum is the external gateway to the prostate, and thus provides numerous opportunities for stimulation. The anus – yes, your butthole. This is the literal gateway to the prostate, which is about 1.5 inches inside your body, on the belly button side. Prostate stimulation through the anus is some men’s Xanadu. Not to mention the fact that the anus is also bursting with nerve endings that beg to be stimulated. More on this later… keep it in the back of your mind for now.

Back to the cock! Many men learn about their sexuality by masturbating. And many learn to masturbate by exclusively stimulating the head of the cock. This is good in that most men do learn about their sexuality at a young age (more than one can say for an alarmingly large percentage of women), but there are downsides to this too. One is that it enforces the idea, at a tender age, that the head of the cock is the center of male sexuality, often to the exclusion of all the other wonderful down-there parts… not to mention the rest of the body! And secondly, because the head is so sensitive, men become accustomed to quick arousal and quick orgasm, thus leading them down the scary dark path to PE – premature ejaculation. Yes, gentlemen, how you masturbate is going to affect how you fuck. Just like how you exercise is going to affect your physical abilities. But I’m getting ahead of myself.  First, to chop the head off an all-too-prevalent myth.

Love the one you’re with
Let me just go ahead and put this out there: There is no way at all in the realm of human possibility (with the possible exception of surgery) to make your penis larger.  Sorry to disappoint. I don’t care what your email tells you. There is no cream, no pill, no contraption, nada that will enlarge your cock.

“But… penis pumps!!” you tell me.

No, friend. Penis pumps are lovely toys that encourage more blood flow to your cock to make it more sensitive and possibly harder, but no. They do not enlarge cocks. You may experience a temporary extra swelling, to the tune of about 1/8 of an inch, for the minutes following vigorous pumpage, but that’s about the size of it.
Before you panic, let me ask you this… does it really matter? I mean, dick size is talked about enough that maybe it matters to in the way that fancy cars or the right clothes matter to some partners, but ew. Who wants that anyway?  The real question I think you’re asking is not “is my cock big enough?” but “how do I rate as a lover?” And these, believe it or not, are two very different questions. Because if we’re talking about intercourse, both the vagina and butt are the most sensitive in the first 2 inches or so. Any deeper than that and you’re running out of nerve endings.  So again, the issue is not necessarily what you have, but how you use it.

And while we’re on the topic of fucking, how about we do away with the idea that the only way to please a partner is by sticking your dick in one of their holes. You have other body parts too, do you not? Hands? Mouth?  Eyelashes? And they have other parts too, do they not? Nipples, lips, thighs?  This hyper-attentiveness to the needs and uses of the penis, in my humble opinion, can lead to a severe stunting of sexual exploration and playfulness… to the point that we don’t even know what we’re missing. So step away from the penis, briefly, if you can… and feast your eyes at that wide, glorious vista spread out before you.

School of Hard Cocks
Now step back to the penis. We’re going to talk about how you can stay hard and last longer. But wait! Before you get all excited about the Boner Wonder Pill, remember that the former statement still stands – there is no pill or cream that will make you last longer. Okay fine, there is Viagra. But wouldn’t you rather have a set of techniques and skills that you can use without having to pop a pill in your mouth every time you want to fuck?

What all this means, though, is that you’re going to have to put in a little time and effort to make your dick work better.  And what that means is that you’re going to have to masturbate more. Think you can do that?

It’s true. Remember when we said that most men focus on masturbating the head of their cocks, thus building the predilection for quick orgasm and intense sensation? Well, you use muscles when you have an orgasm, and you can exercise those muscles to become stronger and more resistant to insta-spooge. Try masturbating by stimulating all of your cock, and in fact, focusing more on the shaft. Explore different levels of stimulation to become accustomed to them. Then, when you feel yourself about to come, stop masturbating before you hit the Point of No Return. Wait at least 15 seconds. Then, start the whole process over again, stopping when you’re about to come. If you can, do this 10 times before you finally let yourself come, even switching positions as you go to become used to different angles. You’re training your muscles to do something different here. Over time, this little experiment can help you last longer.

Another thing you can do is your Kegel exercises. These exercises strengthen your PC (pubococcygeus) muscles, which are the hammock-shaped muscles that run from the front of your pelvis to your butthole and which are a major muscle group involved in orgasm. You can contract your PC muscles by pretending you’re peeing (or if you’re near a toilet, actually peeing) and then stopping the flow of urine. Kegel exercises are just that – the controlled flexing and releasing of your PC muscles. Doing 3 sets of 10 of these every day will start to strengthen these muscles, thus both strengthening your orgasms and helping you control them.

The third means of hardening your cock is even more fun. It involves cock rings. Cock rings fit around the base of the cock, and if you’re feeling sassy, around the balls as well, and they restrict blood flow to the penis. This can result in a stronger-feeling erection because more blood is trapped in the cock. Also, some men find it more difficult to come when wearing a cock ring, thus prolonging sex play for them. Of course, this is not true for all men, nor is it true that all men love using cock rings. Some hate it. But it can be a fun new toy to try with your partner, particularly if you buy a vibrating cock ring, which can stimulate the genitals or anus of the receiving partner.

Now that we’ve dispelled a few myths, learned a few new facts, and collected some techniques, I think we can move on… but if you have any questions that we didn’t answer, please feel free to email us!

Be Sociable, Share!
  • robbiekins

    I bow to your penile knowledge, Eden.

  • last longer in bed

    After reading your post.., I remember a song entitled “The way we were” Great post..

  • last longer in bed

    After reading your post.., I remember a song entitled “The way we were” Great post..